


we (and our fucked up relationship)

by Ascent_96



Category: X1 (Korea Band)
Genre: Angst, M/M, Possibly Unrequited Love, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-07
Updated: 2019-11-07
Packaged: 2021-02-01 02:57:31
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,203
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21346756
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ascent_96/pseuds/Ascent_96
Summary: wooseok watches as he loses another piece of himself each time he gives in to seungyeon
Relationships: Cho Seungyeon | Seungyoun/Kim Wooseok | Wooshin
Comments: 7
Kudos: 47





	we (and our fucked up relationship)

**Author's Note:**

> im originally an angst writer, so i wanted to try writing seungseok with this genre. sorry i had to make our sunflower seungyeon into a jerk... please don't hate him though he is the best guy ever outside from this fanfiction ><. 
> 
> aside from that i just realize im so rusty after not writing for so long ;-;... hope you enjoy reading nevertheless!

_can you come today?_

its a message from seungyeon.

wooseok looks up to the ceiling and sighs, unable to keep count of how many times it has been now.

somehow, it just becomes a habit.

ever since cho seungyeon knows that kim wooseok loves him, he has always taken comfort at the fact that wooseok will always be with him whenever he needs him.

wooseok wants to put a stop to this, he has already promised to himself the moment he saw seungyeon ended up with yet another girl.

but the curse that comes with knowing and loving seungyeon the longest is that he can never allow himself to let seungyeon suffer alone.

before he realizes it, he is already in front of seungyeon’s door, knocking on the door solemnly. when the door opens, the sight breaks his heart.

seungyeon is always a mess after a breakup. the unkempt sight of the other tells him just how miserable he has been since the breakup. when wooseok enters through the door, the sight of the house is an even sadder matter.

pieces of paper with incomplete scrawled letters lie scattered on the floor, empty cans and bottles of alcohol, food wastes everywhere, unwashed dishes in the sink-

wooseok heaves another sigh, thinking of the cleaning he has to do because seungyeon can hardly even care for his house when he is already having trouble caring for himself right now.

before coming here, he has purposely spent a half an hour trip to the shop where they sell seungyeon’s favourite hamburger. as he tries to find a space to put down the food in the plastic, a warm body suddenly hugs him from behind.

_wooseok-ah…_

from the sound of that voice alone, wooseok immediately knows what seungyeon wants. or rather, needs.

he closes his eyes, fingers trying to pry off seungyeon’s hands that are holding him tightly. seungyeon doesn’t budge. _wooseok-ah, i’m lonely…_

it’s always this phrase that he would use. and it’s always this phrase that falters wooseok as he stops. there is a thick lump in his throat, seemingly blocking him from saying anything to seungyeon.

at this kind of moment, its always seungyeon who knows what to do, who will take the lead upon seeing wooseok’s resolve falters like crumbling bricks.

lips latch themselves on the pale column of wooseok’s neck, trailing soft kisses all along it. wooseok purses his lips tightly, he wants to refuse but seungyeon always knows where it feels the most for wooseok.

because they have been doing this kind of thing everytime seungyeon breaks up with his girlfriend. like a toxic routine they have fallen into without realizing.

it just happens that on that one time where seungyeon breaks up with his girlfriend, wooseok is there to comfort him. the feeling of loneliness sparks desire to feel close to someone, the desire to feel someone’s warmth. seungyeon embraces him because he is lonely and wooseok allows him simply because the other _needs_ him.

and he _wants_ to feel needed by cho seungyeon.

as they fall into this habit, little by little wooseok realizes each time a piece of him is broken and stolen away by seungyeon as he allows himself to succumb. before he realizes it, he becomes someone who is half a complete person. its painful, and he cries everytime when he sees seungyeon with another new girl.

remembering all those pain, wooseok suddenly pulls away.

_i can’t do this anymore, seungyeon-ah._

there are tears in his eyes.

_as you are hurting, i’m hurting too because of you._

you who never acknowledge my feelings, you who carelessly use me as if i meant nothing, you who hurt me without thinking how i would feel-

_i don’t know why we ended up like this, seungyeon-ah._

a sob breaks past his lips.

it seems that no matter from what angle they see it, they are already ruined beyond repair.

_wooseok-ah…_ seungyeon calls out, with that sad voice of his. those eyes looks at him as if he understands… but wooseok doesn’t want to be played with another time.

he moves away from seungyeon as far away as he can, huddling himself in the corner as he cries.

seungyeon crouches in front of him, strokes his hair and embraces the smaller figure.

_i’m sorry, please don’t cry…_

its ironic how he is the one comforting wooseok this time. its ironic too how one feels comforted by seeing the other suffering in an equal degree.

seungyeon tilts wooseok’s chin and kisses him deep, swallows all the sobs into his mouth and cajoles wooseok’s tongue with his as if he is sorry. the hand that cups his cheek is warm, almost soothing as long fingers brush off the tears from wooseok's face.

and this is how wooseok surrenders everytime. from the touch that seems to convey an illusion of love and care from cho seungyeon. the love he can only gets from seungyeon when he lets himself become vulnerable and let the other touch him.

its sad and pathetic. but wooseok needs seungyeon’s love, desires it more than anything. so he lets himself give into the other’s caresses as they wander all over his body. his clothes are thrown to the side and he shakily breathes as seungyeon’s lips descend from his neck all the way down, kissing and licking him in places where it shoots searing pleasure to every ends of his body.

wooseok is dazed and barely comprehending when his legs are lifted and thrown over the other’s shoulders before a familiar heat penetrates him fully. for a second, wooseok forgets to breathe as pain consumes his whole senses. but seungyeon brings him back, sweeps his lips over the side of wooseok’s lips comfortingly as he whispers sweet nothings into his ear.

breaths start to come out in a heated rush as their body move to find a rhythm together. when pleasure gradually trickles in to replace pain, wooseok starts to call out seungyeon’s name in an almost-plea. seungyeon, who is enthralled by the flushed face below him, by the pretty eyes that has become hazy with lust, by the lips that can't stop moaning and whimpering, in the end leans down with a heavy exhale and captures the other into a deep kiss.

they ride out their climax with their lips meshed against each other. seungyeon drowns wooseok's cries into his mouth as heat explodes and fills the other up below.

when its over, wooseok turns his back on seungyeon and wraps himself with the covers.

there is a sound of rustling before soft lips touches his shoulder, lazily trailing to his nape. long muscled arms cocoon him securely in their hold and a warm, warm front presses itself to his back. the breathing of seungyeon behind him is calm and comforting as it gradually evens out.

as seungyeon falls asleep, wooseok blinks in the darkness. doesn’t want to give in to the sleep that tries to cascade over his consciousness.

all simply because he wants to stay in this dream-like state as long as he can.

because tomorrow when everything is back to how it is, he has to let go another piece of his heart again.


End file.
